Saturday, April 19, 2003

life sucks, and then IF you're lucky you get to die a quick painless death.

- I don't suspect that I'll ever be that lucky. For those of you who care, and I doubt that there are many of you out there; I got word back from the law school that I applied to. I didn't get in. That and last night the beach bonfire I helped to host, well I had to leave BEFORE the freggin DJ's showed up unexpectedly. DAMN!!!

DAMN my god damned knees. I fucking wonder why god has it out for me sometimes. It is as if I am some real life sissiphus. I have ever only gotten so far...only to be crushed by some crap circumstance. Or maybe it could be the simple fact that I'm lazy...
oh who cares. I'm bored. I think I'll go watch some TV.

Wednesday, April 02, 2003

Living life is important, but it still hurts now that he's gone.
I will miss him, because he made me laugh without any worries
and smile without fear.
I love you Mr David Cocking of the UK.


he died in an accident, not associated to alcohol but freakishly while he was busy with the work of life. I will miss him for the purely selfish reason all people do when someone dies. I will miss him simply because I do not get the chance, spark, the moment of inspiration that every person brings into your life. But I will miss him most because he made my life bright. he made it fun. he made it worthwhile. I wanted to spend so much time with him if only to see what would happen next.

My mother is going to the funeral, Unfortunately I cannot attend. I am still recouperating from the surgery of only two weeks ago. Its odd that this is the second time someone close to me has passed after a knee surgery. I want to believe that it's coincidence, but I'm to superstitious to not think that its not related. Christ. It will be awhile before I can laugh again like that.